The REAL Harry Potter
by Fleur4
Summary: Hey! This is a Harry Potter version of The Real Slim Shady- I kno itz been done like 100 times before,but o well.Enjoy!


The Real Harry Potter [Edited Lyrics]  
  
May I have your attention please?  
  
May I have your attention please?  
  
Will the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
I repeat, will the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
We're gonna have a problem here  
  
Y'all act like ya never seen a scar before  
  
Jaws all on the floor like Voldemort just burst in the door  
  
And started torturing Lucius Malfoy worse than before  
  
He first was disarmed thrown across the floor (Malfoy's scream)  
  
It's the return of the...  
  
"Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,  
  
he just didn't say what I think he did, did he?"  
  
And Lucius said...  
  
Nothing you idiots! Malfoy's dead, he's locked in my basement!  
  
(Ha-ha!)  
  
"Girls love Potter  
  
Chicka chicka chicka Harry Potter,Voldemort? I'm sick of him  
  
Look at him, walking around abusing poor Harry  
  
Flipping at him, yeah, but Harry's so cute though"  
  
Yeah, I probably got a couple of plugs up in my head loose  
  
But no worse than what's going on in Snape's potions class  
  
Sometimes, I wanna get in the book and just let loose, but can't  
  
But it's cool for Draco Malfoy to be a dead moose  
  
"My scar is on your lips, my scar is on your lips"  
  
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss  
  
And that's the message that I deliver to little kids  
  
And expect them not to know what a dementor is  
  
Of course they gonna know what Wormtail is  
  
By the time they hit fourth year  
  
They got the Daily Prophet don't they?  
  
"We ain't nothing but blast-ended-skrewts"  
  
Well, that stupid niffler Draco Malfoy  
  
Who cuts other people open like the Giant Squid  
  
Deserves to be shot  
  
But if we can open up dead animals and antelopes  
  
Then there's no reason that Harry can't blast Voldemort into tiny wisps of smoke  
  
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote  
  
Ginny wave your HP flag, sing the chorus and it goes  
  
I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
Cuz I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
Mad-eye don't gotta flirt in office to get a job  
  
Well I do so "rag him and rag you too!"  
  
You think I care about a 'Witch Weekly most charming smile award'?  
  
Half of you critics can't even think let alone stand me  
  
"But Harry, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"  
  
Why? So you guys can just lie to get me here  
  
So you can sit me here next to the Weird sisters?  
  
Rats, Celestina Warbeck better switch me chairs  
  
So I can sit next to Viktor Krum and Fluer Delacour  
  
And hear them argue over who she kissed first  
  
You little villian, put me on blast on WWN  
  
"Yeah, Ron's cute, but I think he's married to Hermione, hee-hee"  
  
I should download an audio on MP3 and show the whole world  
  
how you gave MAlfoy -(Malfoy's scream)  
  
I'm sick of you little death eaters  
  
All you do is annoy me so I have been sent here to destroy you  
  
And there's a million of us just like me  
  
Who yell like me; who just don't give a d**n like me  
  
Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me  
  
And just might be the next best thing but not quite me!  
  
I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
Cuz I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
I'm like a head trip to listen to cuz I'm only giving you  
  
Things you joke about with your friends inside your Common room  
  
The only difference is I got the guts to say it  
  
In front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or bertie botts every flavour beans coated at all  
  
I just get on a mic and spit it and whether you like to admit it  
  
I just said it better than 90 percent of you trolls out there  
  
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like Chocolate Frogs  
  
It's funny cuz at the rate I'm going when I'm 21  
  
I'll be the only person in St. Mungo's flirting  
  
smiling at nurses when I'm drinking Hagrid's mead  
  
And I'm jerkin' but this whole tankard of butterbeer isn't working  
  
And every single person is a Harry Potter lurking  
  
He could be working at The Three broomsticks spitting on your gillywater  
  
Or in the quidditch pitch, circling, screaming "I don't care!"  
  
With his windows down and too bad they got none  
  
So, will the real Potter please stand up?  
  
And put one of those wands in your hand up?  
  
And be proud to be outta ya mind and outta control  
  
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?  
  
I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
Cuz I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
Cuz I'm Harry Potter, yes I'm the real Potter  
  
All you other Harry Potters are just imitating  
  
So won't the real Harry Potter please stand up?  
  
Please stand up, please stand up  
  
Ha ha  
  
Guess there's a Harry Potter in all of us  
  
Sod it, let's all stand up 


End file.
